In 2019, when he landed in India after years in the United States, there was a sense of quiet purpose behind the move. His parents were getting older. He wanted to be around.
That return did not go as planned. Within weeks, the world was engulfed in a pandemic. The job that had brought him back, based in Bengaluru, never required him to leave his hometown in northern India. For two and a half years, he lived with his parents, worked remotely, and rarely left the house.
“It was a strange time. I loved being near my parents,” he says in the post. “But it was also isolating. I had not lived in India as an adult, and I had no social circle in my small town.” Eventually, he left again, this time to Canada. But four years on, he’s heading back to India. Again, for the same reason. “My only motivation to return to India, both times has been my aging parents,” he noted. Now in his mid-30s, this semiconductor engineer is planning a more structured relocation. He will be based in Bengaluru, where the bulk of India’s semiconductor and electronics industry jobs are located. He is not new to the chaos of Indian life, he has driven here, paid bills, dealt with bureaucracy. But this time, there’s a twist: he will likely give up Indian citizenship after acquiring Canadian nationality.
That means returning to India on an X-1 visa, and later applying for an Overseas Citizen of India (OCI) card, a process that takes at least six months. “I will be coming back as an Indian citizen but will renounce it once I get my Canadian passport. So I’ll be in that in-between status on an entry visa before OCI comes through,” he explains. “I have heard most companies don’t care if you’re on OCI, but I want to be sure. It would be frustrating to move back and then face HR hesitation.”
“After 5.5 years of leaving the U.S., I have realised that the only place in the world that felt like home was America,” he says. “India and Canada have their own challenges, but at least here I’ll be around my parents.” There is clarity in his voice, but also an ache. He knows this isn’t permanent. It’s time borrowed. “My parents won’t be here forever. I want to make this time count. I can always move again even at 60. But there’s no making up for this time.”
When asked about what he fears most, he does not mention job markets or traffic or bureaucracy. It is the loneliness of returning as an adult who never really lived in India. “I was 21 when I left. I have never lived in a big Indian city. Even during COVID, I was homebound in my town. Bengaluru will be the first real metro experience for me here.” He has heard from other returning NRIs that social integration can be tricky. Friendships in India are often formed during college years or early work life. Many returnees end up gravitating towards expat circles.
“I’m not looking for expat bubbles. I want to find meaningful friendships. But I don’t know how easy that will be. I’m curious, a little nervous.” If re-rooting socially is hard, navigating the Indian arranged marriage market as an OCI aspirant has been harder.
“Last couple of years, I’ve had a really tough time. Girls in India saw my future OCI status as a hassle. Girls abroad weren’t interested once they knew I planned to return to India for a few years. I didn’t fit neatly into anyone’s checklist.” NRI further stated, “It’s the biggest paradox of my life,” he says. “Emotionally, the US still feels like home. But practically, it’s India that needs me right now.”